The best and the worst.. Life has many aspects

by marteandkristin

Before I start, I will first say that I have soo much to be thankful for, and that the last year have been one of mye best.

– I went out from 10 th grade as one of the best students in class.

– This summer I participated Nationals, in two relays, and it was one of the best things I’ve done! Have never been soo happy, and proud of myself before.

– Got a new, very talented coach. And our swimclub is reaching new heights!

– I got the best class I could ever imagine when we started at the new school in August. I love my class. And my teachers are great. And my results in school are better than ever, even though I have been sick.

– I have made soo many new, amazing friends.

All of that was great, and this year has in many ways been my best…But also the worst. I believe that it will help to write things down, and maybe hear some advices and supporting words from others. Maybe this is one of the reasons that I got so sick, and I’m going to be very honest now. Even though I hate to admint that I’m not always the “superwoman” I would like to be.

I can take it from last February. I was quite sick of everything, some of mye bestfriends trained with another swimteam because of our old coach. He had been in our club for more than 20 years, and he was a very special man. In both positive and negative ways. He was very arguing, and didn’t take criticism at all. But he was soo caring. I’m a person that hate conflicts, and had a good realationship with my coach, as I have with everyone else. But I was stuck in the middel of everything, my friends, my coach, and even the board in our club  came to me.. “Kristin do that..Kristin what are they saying about that” And so on. On top of that I was very tired, and had a lot to do in school and with friends. One day, we were watching a movie in class, and then, suddenly I gasped. I thought I was going to faint, but my bestfriend gave me some water, and I went home. Late that night I felt that I could not breathe, and since I never had felt something like that before, I was sure it was something very wrong with me. We went to the emergency, I was hyper-ventilating, crying, and were very shaken. It was fortunately nothing wrong with me. But the doctor gave me a sedative pill to calm down. My doctor said it was a stress or panic attack, and that I just had to calm down a bit.

I skipped some practices, but after I week I was back in normal, like nothing had happend. And I had an amazing spring, and start of the summer. But then, the summer turned. I’m sure that most of you have heard about 22/7-2011. A bomb went off  in the governmentbuilding, and is was a shooting  on Utøya. We have always believed that Norway was the most secure place on earth. Also did the teenagers who were attending a political summercamp on Utøya. My friend was one of the 77 persons who died that day. The beautiful girl, who was my bestfriend in 2nd and 3rd grade (about 8 years old). She was always protecting me, when this boy with disabled social skills, said he would beat us up, and so on.   I have never seen her angry, she was always smiling, laughing, or singing. I just can’t understand that someone could hurt her, or anyone else. When we grew older, we came in different classes and had different friends, but talked to her on school, or on the bus. When I heard that my friend was on Utøya I was praying for her, and I can just imagine how her family and bestfriends felt. I can’t believe that this happened to Norway, so near where I live, and to a girl I have known since kindergarden. I’m still not believing it.

I were on vacation in Greece when all this happened, and just a few days after 22/7, my family friend got a heart attack, when he, my dad and I was swimming in the ocean. He spent some weeks in hospital and recovered. But it was scary, and I remembered how I felt that night in February. On top of all this, another girl on my school lost both her parents in a boat accident earlier that summer.It’s terrible.

All this really made its impact on me. But life went on, and I  had so much going on that it was no time to think so much about it. But after I got sick I’ve sometimes been feeling very stressed and like I’m having a kind of panic. Last summer was really a big realitycheck for me. I was so happy, and then  it felt like something were punched in my face. I understood that life could really be unfair.

This was a lot, but I think it will be good for me to share it with you.

Love Kristin