Who wins? Goodness or badness?
by marteandkristin
Last night, I couldn’t sleep. To many thoughts spinned inside my head. To be honest, I was negative. I thought of all the people I was jealous about and in the end, I became upset. Everyone has those days, right? 
Well, because I couldn’t sleep, I started to read the Secret. The thing about the Secret, is that unmatter how many times I descide to finish it, I never do. I think I have started to read it like four times, but last night, I finally finished. The reason for why I never finished, was because it is a lot of info, and your mind and way of thinking totally change during the book. It is a lot to handle in short time, therefore, I like to read small pieces from it day to day.
Nevertheless, when I thought those negative thoughts, I started to think about compliments. Many people say that one bad comment, measure up 100 good compliments. And I agree on that one. It is hard to think positive thoughts about yourself, and the reason is that you don’t want to seem superior. You don’t want people to think that you think that you are better than someone else. Therefore, we start to think negative thoughts and negative things about ourself. THIS IS WRONG! It totally destroyes your confidence, and ability to be satisfied with yourself as a person in this world.
For some years ago, I had a fight with my bestfriend (not Kristin). We fought and argued and we sad some really bad things to each other. It ended up that we both said things we never should have said, and when we became friends, I never really forgot the thing she said about me. Unmatter how many times she apologized, I couldn’t forget it. I know she said it just to hurt me, but it felt like she stabbed me in my heart. Now I laugh at the whole situation. We were young, and childish. And we are good friends today.
But, why is it that we always think about the negative? It totally destroyes everything! People must learn to accept compliments, and to give! A small thing you notice, for an example: “You look great today” can really brightend your day up. At least mine do. When people say positive things about me, I embrace it. I remember it, and I really appriciate it. It makes me feel good. That people think something good about me, and see me as something positive.
And really, people who say something bad about you and doesn’t even know you, they are the weird ones. It is very hard to just accept that some people think you are something that you’re not, but that is their descision, and their problem. If they really want to spend their energy thinking something of you that you’re not, that is up to them. I need to learn this too.
Today’s compliment: I get easily tan
Marte
Good post
couldn’t agree more.
Do you think the same can be said in the work place?
In my professional life bad comments roll off me like water off a ducks back as it is the nature of the creative industry to have my ideas criticised.
But in my personal life one bad comment can really F**K me off. I shall be giving someone a compliment today
Your post is absolutely true, negativity can screw you up and destroy you at the end. Always be positive and smile, life has a way of giving you back what you offer
Very true statement Marte. I guess we think about the negative more than we do the positive though, because it is the negative comments that can just hit us to the core. The saying “Forgive but not forget” rings true to me after reading this. It is difficult to forgive at times if someone has said something bad to us, but at other times it can be fairly easy. However, when we are told something bad about ourselves, it is something that stays with us throughout time, and we never forget it. I believe with time, it can be forgotten, and just one positive comment can overshadow and wipe away all of the bad compliments. i felt a connection with this blog, becaus I have had some bad compliments thrown my way too, but plenty of positive compliments have been said about me, and I treasure those most of all.
Surprise! You have been awarded the Liebster Award! http://aliciabozza.wordpress.com
Thank you so much! That really means a lot to us!
We are very new at this, so this means a lot to us!
I am happy you are both excited! Now your job in accepting the award, you are to follow the directions posted on my site (on Monday’s post) there are some simple directions, including posting the award to your site (it is in the widgets section, under the dashboard) have fun!
Love today’s compliment!! Yes – you are super fab.
AWW
That is so nice of you! You are the best!
Marte
Back at ya!
Very insightful and just what I needed today.
Hey thanks for visiting my blog.
There is something about Badness, you may forgive someone for it but forgetting it is hard, I feel this works till the time you dont let that memory of yours judge a person in the future. It’s normal to have bad memories but lets try keeping a positive outlook!
Wow how very true this is. If only we could remember the good things as easily as we remember the bad. Great post & great blog!
So many people have trouble accepting compliments nowadays. A lot of suspicion of ulterior motives, and mistrust of genuinity. Real compliments, that are accepted with grace…that’s the key. Great post.
My wise old grandmother always told me that 10% of the people I meet will like me because they are likeable people and 10% of the people I meet will hate me because they are hateful people. The other 80% of the people are people who might like or hate me depending on my words and actions. It’s true, and each time I run into someone in the 10% of hateful people, I run from them as fast as possible.
Wow, you are right on with your blog today. Nice Job! My mother always had this to say: “If you can’t say something NICE, don’t say anything.”
I remember 2 years earlier, we sat down at our classroom and had a film showing about the secret… We were not serious back then but it inspired us, will power, is a powerful thing.. Although I remember, adding two zeros in mmy bank slip I had that day, well, needless to say it didnt happen… But, im planning to reread it over the summer (our summer, april, may)
nicely written.
Hey fellow reader of the Secret – try the Power- it”s even more amazing!!
I love your posts- a breath of fresh air, you write from the heart in a language that isn’t yours. Amazing and wonderful.
Thank you for liking my blog too-very motivating for me.
Yes why do we listen to the negative? You can listen to the positive and not be bigheaded, or araogant. Why because listening to those hleps us to pass on the good energy to others and make them feel better.
You must listen to the the podcast The masters of the Secret, so empowering. The Law of attaraction is only part. Kahyehm – you need to focus, ask yourself how you could get the money and start taking action, then things wil lfall in to place to start giving it to you. If you want a glass of lemonade, drawing a picture will not get it, you need to take action- where to buy, find the cupboard, the glass, serve it… It is not magic.
Remember when people die. The bosy is a shell, only a shell, it is that that is old and tired. the spirit lives always, it is energy and energy never dies. Your Grandad lives on in spirit, always x
Your caption/ heading says it all, Marte. Yes, it takes a lot to nurture something [be it a plant, a baby or our attitudes] and very little to destroy it. I think of life as a highway, and me as a driver. I can do nothing to prevent another driver crashing into my vehicle, but being aware that this is possible helps me be prepared. We cannot change others, but we can change ourselves. When others try to insult us or put us down let us simply refuse to accept it. When we refuse a gift, it goes back to the person who gave it, doesn’t it? So too, when we refuse to accept an insult that is injurious to our mental health, it only belongs to the person who tried to give it to us!
We think about the negative because that is how our society is structured. We are taught from a very early age not to praise ourselves. If we can’t say something nice about ourselves, then what other choice do we have?
The response to a complement should always be, “thank you” not something like, “it was no big deal.” You are right, your mind will record whatever you say (no big deal) no questions asked.
This is why so many of us do not realize how wonderful we are.
I always say, praise yourself in the darkness and praise others in the light.
Good job. (just say thank you LOL)